Why Your Relationship is Failing, and How to Save it Single Handedly!

You wake up one day and your relationship is shattered. Most of the passion that existed between the two of you is gone, and your mate says â??Iâ??m not in love with you anymore,” or “I don’t feel the same way about you.â? Maybe youâ??ve recently separated, are in the mists of a divorce, or are in a relationship crisis. Even though it seems that the crisis appears suddenly, in many cases it does not. A relationship crisis usually builds slowly over time with one person caught completely off guard, and the other claiming that they are tired of trying and trying with no change. Many people are baffled when they find themselves in the mists of a relationship crisis, wondering what went wrong! More often than not this causes the person on the receiving end to feel victimized, and they conclude that their partner is to blame. However, I have a different take on this, and have proven time and time again that nothing in your relationship or your life will change until you are willing to change from the inside out! Ok, I can hear you saying right now;

 

·        But, what about my husbands infidelity? Thatâ??s what caused our crisis!

·        But, what about the way my partner tries to control everything I do?

·        But, what about the fact that my partner works so much and is never home?

·        But, what about the fact that my partner never spends any time with me?

·        But, what about my partners sarcasm, criticism and belittling demeanor?

·        But, what about the way my partner argues and fights with me?

·        But, my husband doesnâ??t listen to me!

 

When you say but; it really means that you didnâ??t hear a word that I said!

 

Donâ??t get me wrong, I am not at all condoning the above-mentioned behavior, but the fact remains that none of that will change until you do! You see, there is an underlying reason for your husbandâ??s behavior, and some of that may in fact rest with him. However, you wonâ??t get him to change by telling him to do so, or by finding fault with what he has done. What if I said to you right now; you are completely to blame for your relationship crisis and you need to change. Did I make you angry? Do you resent me for what I said? Oh yes, I can see the steam coming out of your ears! What makes you think for one minute that youâ??ll get a different reaction out of your partner? Well, you wonâ??t! You see, people resist change when they are being forced or manipulated to do so, but watch them change in a big hurry when itâ??s their idea! Its all about change isnâ??t it? If you could only get your partner to spend more time with you, work less often, be more understanding, more romantic, less sarcastic, less critical, less verbally abusive, less controlling, or completely monogamous then you would have the perfect relationship! The question is how do you get someone to change who feels that they havenâ??t done anything wrong, or that their behavior is justified? You change the only side of the equation that you can. Yours! Ok, I can hear you thinking again! Youâ??re probably saying; why should I change when itâ??s his fault, or how is changing my side of the equation going to make him change his behavior? Well, there is no 100% guarantee that it will, but it is my experience that 85% of the time that is exactly what will occur! Let me ask you a serious question for moment, and I want you to ponder it long and hard!

 

If you donâ??t change from the inside out what will be different in your next relationship or marriage?

 

Do you honestly believe that the crisis you have found yourself neck deep in will go away, if you donâ??t deal with the underlying issues? The answer is it wonâ??t! And, in all likelihood you will attract a similar partner in your next relationship!!! You see, it is not a matter of who is right or wrong, but rather a question of whether you want to save your relationship. There is an old saying; â??being right doesnâ??t always go along with being happy.â? Therefore, if you are destined to prove that the cause of your failing relationship rests squarely on the shoulders of your partner, you may as well draw up the divorce settlement agreement, or pull the plug on the relationship because that is where it will end up anyway! On the other hand, if you truly want to save your relationship it will take a bit of self discovery and change on your part to do so! You see, this is more about you than it is about saving your relationship, and until you began to view it from that perspective nothing will change!

 

 

 

For more information on how to save a relationship subscribe to my free e-guide belowâ?¦..

 

save relationship

 

Best wishes,

 

â??The Relationship Rehab Coachâ?

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David founded Relationship Rehab for Women in 2002, and set out on a quest to deliver real relationship information that people can put right to work…. to make a difference!


He is also known for being compassionate and understanding, and he works tirelessly for clients to help them find inner happiness and the relationship of their dreams!


David Roppo is an enthusiastic crusader of what’s possible and is driven to make the world a better place one relationship at a time!


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The Secret Principles to Saving a Relationship

You wake up one day and your relationship is shattered. Most of the passion that existed between the two of you is gone, and your mate tells you that they don’t love you anymore. Maybe you’ve recently separated or are in the mists of a a relationship crisis. Even though it seems that the crisis appears suddenly, in many cases it does not. A relationship crisis usually builds slowly over time, with one person caught completely off guard, and the other claiming that they are tired of trying and trying, with no change. However, getting your mate to change themselves starts with you!

Step One: The Secret Principle for Removing Conflict and Hostility from a Relationship

 Always agree. That’s right! Even if you still think your partner is wrong!

If you talk about where they are wrong they become more wrong, and if you talk about where they are right they immediately become less wrong. You see, most people don’t know that if you agree and sound sincere to the other person while refraining from defending yourself they will actually defend you! They will not only defend you, but in many cases will actually reverse their position. Now, I don’t at all mean that you should agree to every request that your partner has and reduce your self respect to the bottomless pit of no return. I want you to agree with what they blame you for, in regard to the relationship crisis. I will admit that this is difficult, and you will be tempted to argue with and criticize your partner in an attempt to change them.

However, if you wish to save your relationship you must try and avoid this behavior by putting your emotions aside!

Your partner says, “You know I don’t love you anymore, you don’t understand me, and we never communicate.” Your initial reaction would be to defend yourself by attacking their short comings! Avoid doing this at all costs!!!! Instead, try these two simple phrases; I agree, and I understand.

Tell them that you agree, and that you understand they’ve been asking you for a change, and you haven’t given it to them!

Don’t blame them for not wanting to be in the relationship any longer. You may at first feel like your moving toward ending the relationship, but really you are getting to the root of why they feel the relationship isn’t working. They want the relationship to end because you’re always disagreeing with and trying to change them, and they have asked you for a change, but you haven’t given it to them.

Step Two: Change your Side of The Equation by overcoming Self-Limiting Beliefs, Fears, and Insecurities.

When in the mists of a relationship crisis most people feel victimized and conclude that their partner is to blame. However, I have a different stance on this, which can best be exemplified by Bill Murray in the movie Ground Day. If you look closely there is a deep profound message here, for relationships. Murray the jaded weatherman is forced to step into the proverbial mud puddle day after day after day. His continued desperate attempts to break the cycle of reliving the same day again and again fail miserably, when he manipulates people and lies for his own self gratification. It is only when he begins to offer compassion, understanding and unconditional love that he got a different result. The lesson here is that nothing will change in our lives until we change from the inside out!

You see, saving your relationship does rest solely in your hands! In order to get your partner to change you must change! Take the time to do a bit of self reflection to uncover the patterns that are causing your crisis. What self limiting beliefs are sabotaging your relationship? Discover what these beliefs are and overcome them, and you hold the key to fixing your relationship! You see, these negative beliefs actually prevent you from being your true self, and the best way to have the relationship of your dreams is to be your most joyous, exquisite, loving self.

You must be your most true authentic self, bubbling over with feminine grace and the sheer jubilation in being the woman that you are. To do that you have to discover who you really are inside and what it feels like to be your true best self. This takes awakening your true self and developing your own personal power. One way to awaken your Feminine Grace is through meditation. Quieting the mind through the practice of meditation will force the ego to take a back seat and allow your feminine grace to shine through. Many woman practice ego-centered love and have yet to discover their true inner self and their gifts of feminine grace. Perhaps that’s because going inside yourself and taking a good hard look at who you really are is a difficult task. However, finding the courage to embark on this vision quest and discovering your feminine grace is well worth the effort. Not only will you shed the self limiting beliefs that have sabotaged your relationship, but you’ll be amazed at how your partner will respond to you! He won’t be able to exist without you!!!

 Let’s sum up the Secret Principle, shall we?

A. Agree with your partner about the issues they blame you for, in regard to the relationship crisis. Enthusiastically see it their way. Avoid arguing, complaining and criticizing. Remove the hostility and allow them to change themselves.

B. Nothing will change in your life until you change from the inside out, and change your side of the equation! Discover your true self and your Feminine Grace. Remove the negative self limiting beliefs. Act out of unconditional love, understanding and compassion to attract the same from your partner.

 

The following statement of agreement is based on a relationship, which the partner blames and resents his wife for being verbally abusive, and controlling, which has caused the crisis to escalate to the point of separation.

 I have been thinking about some things and I want you to know that I agree with you and I understand. I know that there have been times when I have been verbally abusive and have said things to you that I shouldn’t have. I also know that because of my own fears I have been very controlling in our relationship. Never wanting you to have any friends, and always being suspicious of where you are and what you’re doing, even though you’ve never given me a reason to feel that way. I know that you have asked me for a change and I haven’t given you one, so I honestly don’t blame you for feeling the way that you do. And, I don’t blame you for wanting the separation! I just wanted to tell you that I understand.

 

 

For more information on how to save a relationship subscribe to my fee e-guide and weekly e-zine;

Saving relationship

 Best wishes,

 David Roppo

Relationship Rehab for Women

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America’s Relationship Coach


Awakening the possibility in every Relationship!


David founded Relationship Rehab for Women in 2002, and set out on a quest to deliver real relationship information that people can put right to work…. to make a difference!


He is known for being compassionate and understanding, and he works tirelessly for clients to help them find inner happiness and the relationship of their dreams!


David Roppo is an enthusiastic crusader of what’s possible and is driven to make the world a better place one relationship at a time!


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Ways To Save A Floundering Relationship

There are many different ways to save a relationship and in the majority of cases partners that are having trouble in their relationships will look at the options that suit them the best. If you have a long standing relationship that has begin experiencing difficulties then looking for ways to save relationship guidance is well worth the effort. If you really love your partner then it is even more important in doing everything possible to make your relationship work and to put it back on a strong footing again.


The first few months are a learning curve in a relationship because this is when you start finding out about your partner’s needs, likes, dislikes and habits. Some conflicts may arise during this time that may erupt into ugly arguments, and in moments of heated anger things can be said that can do a lot of damage. There may be other differences of opinion and ways of doing things which may be resolved through compromise but this can only be done when both partners are in a calm state of mind. There are several ways to save a relationship on your own but if they fail then seeking professional counseling may be the only sensible solution.


After you have realized that your relationship is in danger because of the problems you are facing, you must start looking at the different options that are available to save your relationship. Initially some couples can discuss the issues with each other and even come to a satisfactory and beneficial solution. This is where communication plays an enormous part in a relationship. Enjoying open communication with each other means that solving problems may just be a matter of talking them through.


Serious problems in relationships can be resolved through the advice of a relationship counselor but it is important that both parties mutually agree to go and attend these sessions. At a professional relationship counselor partners both have the option of openly airing their problems and in the majority of cases an appropriate solution is found. There are other ways to save a relationship and another one that works fairly well is a trial separation which gives a person some space to analyze their feelings, and then come to terms of where the relationship is going. Many partners choose this option especially if they are feeling stifled by the relationship.


After you have researched ways to save a relationship and the different options then the next step is communicating these to your partner and deciding which route that will work out the best is. Tasking the right advice will bring you closer together with your companion and also teach you how to compromise so that your relationship can flourish. If you want to get the best out of your relationship with your companion then learning ways to save a relationship will stand you in good stead and this information can be used to strengthen the bonds with your partner both spiritually and sexually.

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Relationship: How can I Get my Ex Back Tips to Save Relationship

I like Saturday evenings: after the work week Saturday is the day when you can relax, have a nice dinner by candle light with friends, family or just you two-your love, partner and you. But I know not everybody enjoys the weekends or holidays, maybe even afraid of those days because when you are single or you going through healing time after break up with somebody you love, and thinking that breaking up was a mistakeâ?¦Question â??How can I get my ex backâ? becomes a question you constantly ask yourself.

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Let me tonight share with you a few tips: how you can get your ex back.

Although a breakup with a boyfriend or with a girlfriend can be really depressing, it does not need to mean that the relationship is over. Even if the breakup should suddenly leave you feeling confusion and loneliness, you may still feel really eager to heal the wounds and jump right back in to that relationship with your ex. If you are asking yourself “How can I get my ex back?”, then there are some things you need to know. If you learn how to react following a break up, and you become aware of how not to strain the relationship even further, then getting ex back will be easier than ever.

It can seem hard to keep up a cheerful attitude throughout your day following a breakup, but it is believed by relationship experts believe that an optimistic and confident attitude can go a long way. Here are some of the ways that a confident attitude can answer the question “how can I get my ex back?”

Keep your confidence – If you are asking “how can I get my ex back?”, then you should remain confident. Rather than going around feeling gloomy, try to find ways that you can keep yourself occupied and happy. Keep the depression out of your demeanor. Allow your ex boyfriend or girlfriend to know that you are strong and that you are more than capable of handling such an emotional situation, and also that you are capable of surviving on your own as well.

Remain socially active – If getting your ex back is your primary focus, surround yourself with well wishers, positive attitudes and good friends. Show your ex that people appreciate you, and that they love having you around. As more people begin to feel good about your presence in their lives, your ex will begin to see you in a completely new light. He or she will realize that yes, you are a good person that they simply cannot afford to let go of. This is one of the best ways to let your ex notice you in a new light.

Maintain a good appearance – another solution to “How can I get my ex back?” is not to let your appearance reflect your situation. You need to pay attention to every detail of your looks, including your clothes, your make up, your hair, your shoes and even your voice. It can be hard to act happy or to take care of yourself following a bad breakup, but this is one of the best ways that you can let your ex know that you are doing just fine, and do not need to beg for his or her sympathy. You are going to get back together like adults who are mature and responsible if you are going to get back together at all.

Think these tips were good? Check out this site http://www.exbackSOS.com/  or visit my blog http://exbackSOS.blogspot.com/ for more tips which are even better!

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Why Women Leave Men – 5 Things You Must Do To Stop Your Lady Leaving You!

If you are worried that your wife or girl is getting ready to leave you, or has already left you, you may want an answer to the question:’why women leave men?’ The truth of the affair is that it’s potentially not what you suspect, and there may be many reasons.

In any long-term relationship things pile up. After a bit you will have one very big wall. That is the point where one party will throw their hands up and say ‘Enough!’ and leave. The main thing is to be sure your relationship never gets to that point.

If you think women are needy, and high maintenance you need to re-evaluate your thinking ( naturally some women are that way, but not most of them ). While this could sound stupid here is something that you should try; stop thinking of your lady as a lady, instead think about her as a person. Read the rest of this entry

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